aww ok finally i put this post up on the blog. I've been thinking about somethings on my mind for awhile. It's been stress relieving for me being me and not going crazy for other people mistakes. I heard a song by Cee-Lo that I really put to heart, its called Sometimes. mml, funny how i have song like this with the same title. But anyway the story is this, life and answers unknown for questions never ask. How was the universe formed, what does God look like? Why does the sky reflect so much on people's feelings throughout the day, difference between fate and free will? who gives a fuck about these things on the regular, am i the only thinker who thinks this way so frequently? why are girls so mysterious, what goes thru their mind? can i ever find a girl that just keep it real and say what's she wants? (***, mostly)
these questions and so so so much more are on my mind. To be honest, i haven't talk to Dan or Daniel in a minute, i think we've been so focus on school and our lives that we don't talk as much as we did. though we are still tight and improvement is evident every time we hang. love for my brothers, family, god and a woman seems like the idea of happiness for a man. money can surround, but love just fills it.
Idk, sometimes i rap in my mind and come up with so much shit, i cant help it. who gets influence like this. my boy Brandon blog is way deep, i support anybody that has opinions, dreams and be themselves. I've tried so hard to become the man my father wanted me to be. Now, 19 yrs old, I've realize that i have to be a man for myself. Fuck the way of living everybody has planned for me, everything planned does not go. my plans have flaws, no bickering about it. i just hope one day, people realize what I'm trying to do. I'm not doing this for my own help, this is for everybody. Be yourself man, think the way you want to think, say what you need and want to say. You'll be surprise what feeling you get from it.
Sometimes man i feel so alone in this world, nobody understands me. the shit from my past scarred me so bad i wouldn't be here if i didn't think i could do something. yes, i was suicidal still think some of the thoughts but it's all good. i guess it's like a gift and a curse, to be so original and yet so dependent. (sorry i had a brief moment to catch myself, that shit was deep to me) idk, to see some of the things I've seen (saw a guy get shot twice in NY when i was little), hear the things I've heard, been thru some rough times and still see inspiration in this world. WOW, that's what i call love right there. it's just some peaceful thinking man, you got to let stress out sometimes, even if its by yourself. peaceful thinking.
"Sometimes" by Cee-Lo Green
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